Tuesday, April 1, 2014

Missing child or homicide?

Each time I hear a story of a missing child it breaks my heart. There are so many evil people out there, that the thought of what they could be going through is horrifying.

What is worse however, is the thought that the child is actually harmed by mom or dad… or both.

It seems like we have had so many missing cases over the last few years that look more like harm came to the child in their own home by the very people that should protect them with their own lives.

I have talked about a couple of these cases on my blog. It is infuriating. What is even more infuriating is that these parents are getting away with it. 


How is it that the average Joe Citizen is outsmarting the police? Some of these average Joes are druggies who struggle to survive, hold down a job etc. but they are getting away with murder? These are not rocket scientists. 

Have police gotten lazy, stupid? Or are these monsters just getting smarter.

I am just not sure anymore.


But I see past the bullshit even if the physical evidence does not exist. 


For me, there two main things that a parent of a missing child will do that immediately takes me from a missing child case to a potential murder/cover up.

 

1.       They do not search/call out for the child

2.       They speak of the child in past tense.

 

Let’s discuss this further.

 

1)       Mom and dad do NOT search or call out for the child

How do you NOT search? Your child is missing and you sit at home and do what? Wait? Wait for what. The only reaction is searching.

Most of us parents have had the child dart under the clothes rack at the store, or wander to the next isle. We know that panic. I have felt it. It was the clothes rack. It was seconds and the fear that overcame me is unexplainable. FEAR, PANIC. A loving parent feels nothing less.

I follow a blog about Statement analysis by Peter Hyatt. He made a comment about a parent that does not search. He basically said it would be like losing your child at the store and instead of frantically searching, you got in your car, went home and waited for someone else to find them. I don’t know a single parent that would do that.

So when I see this lack of searching…..I am instantly concerned and begin to see the parents as the main suspect.

 

The panic, fear. It should take over. It should be a natural instinct as a loving parent. There is no other reaction. I have seen cases where mom and dad searched till they could not walk, searched places that were dangerous, dug in trash dumpsters, searched high and low. That is the only type of parent that should be a parent. The rest in my mind are guilty.  Even if it is not of murder, but neglect.


One thing that I have seen for years is that so many people wish to dispute these expected reactions from mom and dad. Callers on the Nancy Grace show, followers of a blog, etc. I see it over and over and over again. The response is always “everyone reacts different”.

This is always said in defense of the mom and dad. 

One example I have seen was with the case Isabel Celis (see my blog post on this case). Mom and dad did nothing. They did not search and they did not speak out. Instead, they sat in their home for 2 weeks. When they finally emerged…. Only because they pressured…. What was the reason mom gave for not speaking out…. “WE WERE GREIVING”. 

FAIL. 

While I can understand this word to some degree, I just find that choice of words very out of order for a “KIDNAPPING”. 

The child is just missing. She could have wondered off. Typically people do not grieve immediately after they discover their child missing but rather go into a panic, they are fearful, they are motivated to find that child.

To sit in your room and cry is something that I would expect when you got the news that the child was found deceased. Even if months have gone by with no leads I can under stand grieving. 


But immediately after, your natural instinct would be to find them. 

My cousins little girl walked out of the house once. The door was shut but we think the wind blew it back upen and she walked out. 

Now, she was found safe. Let me start with that..... She just walked to the house next door and was quietly playing in the back yard. 


But it was a good 3 minutes before she was found. My cousin (her mom) was in a panic I have never seen before. She was screaming her name, she was running, looking under every tree, in every yard, SCREAMING. People were coming out of their homes and began helping. They began searching their yards and that is where she was found.

Now imagine this same scenario. Imagine that my cousin just closed the door and cried. Does that make any sense to you?

Then how these people can excuse that behavior is beyond me.

There is no excuse.

If you do not search…... If you do not call out for your child….  You are now the prime suspect in my mind. And I am at this point concerned the child is in fact not alive and you know this. You know there is nothing to search for.

PERIOD.

 

Sergio and Becky Celis  

Gerry and Kate Mccann

Billie Jean Dunn

Justin DiPietro

Greg and Ericka Lewis

To me you are all responsible for your Child’s disappearance. Your actions from day one told me that. Your continued lack of concern, effort, or action has proven it over time. 

 

2)       Mom and dad speak of the child in past tense

Let me ask you a question. You don’t even need to be a parent.

Tell me about your mom, dad, sister, son, cousin. Pick one that is alive and well. Tell me how you would describe them.

Would you say:

They WERE funny.

They WERE loving.

They WERE sweet.

I LOVED her/him

Or would you say:

They ARE funny.

They ARE loving.

They ARE sweet.

I LOVE her/him

 

If they are alive, they “ARE FUNNY”. If they are alive you “LOVE THEM”. Using past tense when your child is MISSING, tells us that in your mind, that child is not “missing” and ALIVE but no longer living.

This goes back to what I have learned in statement analysis.

As a child we learned pronouns. We learned verb tense. It is one thing that is used every time we speak. It is instinctive. Its natural.

Verb tense does not lie.

We speak of our kids, our spouse in present tense. 

It is that simple. Verb tense does not lie.

 

 

Parents that do not search, may just be neglectful. But parents that do both…..do not search, call out and speak of the child in past tense….

To me, they are guilty. 


Period. 

 

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